Semester 2

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This semester went by too fast. It’s as if I was just standing at the side and watched myself succeed then fail over and over again. Everytime I walk forward ten steps I feel like I’ve been pushed back 1000 steps backwards. It wasn’t all failure though. There were still moments I want to keep in a box forever and just look back at it whenever.
There are people I don’t talk to anymore. Important people. To say that it wasn’t meant to be would just be an awful way to cover things up. Things happened and there you have it.
And then there are people I spent my whole semester with. From meeting each other only after classes to spending the whole night playing truth or dare. These people are the people I am so so grateful for. I cant promise myself I would keep them forever. It’s a thing I do, to leave people unexpectedly with no absolute reason. I don’t expect people to understand because I don’t myself but what I do understand for now is to live the moment. Don’t create problems that aren’t there.
There was the suicidal urges. I kept this mostly to myself. It wasn’t big of deal but it still makes me flinch everytime it passes through my mind.
This semester was the semester I cried a lot. Mostly for myself. My friends saw me at my lowest. Although they didn’t know what to do at the moment they still stayed and asked if I were okay. I found true friends. Even though I lost a few of them, I found new ones. They helped me in many ways and in no way I could repay them.
I moved out. A fresh start I guess. A new roommate with new people.

To wrap it up I guess I could say this semester was so many things but it was never regret.

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