So much to say

So much to say, but it just won’t come out. It’s so fucking hard. Daily conversations going on in my head constantly, surreal scenarios, but never to put it out in real life. There’s hate, there’s love, there’s confusion. I keep them to myself. To say them out loud would just be an embarrassment. There would be questions going on in my head. Am I in the right state of mind? Is this the lack of sleep talking? Or do I genuinely feel this way? Should I really say it? But I never do anyways.