Him, You
You. I'd like to talk about you. Tell people how you are but at the same time keep it to myself so people won't discover how magnificent you are and so that I could have you all to myself and let you implode inside of me. You're amazing and even that would be an understatement. God why am I talking about you like this? I could be over you in less than a year and I'd look back at this post & be like wow was I that stupid?
But in less than six months it'll be one year since I met you and gosh I wouldn't call it love yet but I still adore you as much as I did the first I talked to you, probably more (definitely more). I adore you I absolutely do and I'd like to tell you that but I don't want your reaction to be disgusted. I want you to be okay with it (and maybe you could adore me too?) we could be totally platonic but I still wanna call you cute names and tell you how angelic you are (you are btw).
You're definitely one of the kindest guy I've ever met (even though what you do to me is horrifying and I'm still calling you kind because there's something wrong with me (and it's wrong for me to think this way)). You're so, you're too overwhelming for words.
You're you. You check up on people. You try to keep in touch with people even though you admit you're really bad it. You cut toxic people out of yourself so easily (or that's how I see it). You ask people how they are. You tell people you miss them. You keep telling me you miss me and never once have I say it back because I never thought you really meant it. You tell people to be kind. You say stupid jokes. You're dirty minded. I still remember the picture you sent me. The one you posed infront of a display window of a lingerie shop and somehow as dirty minded you are, I know you know boundaries and I adore that dirty minded side of you. You're goofy especially when you're with your friends. You tell people what's best for them. You have a thing for traveling. You often tell me how you've always wanted to escape to somewhere with a few of your friends or with the love of your life. You appreciate your friends so much even when you say you don't. You sing, oh god, so well. I'd like to fall asleep with the phone next to me with your soothing voice dancing their way through my ear canals. You play the piano and I could never get tired watching you play the piano. Your hands, the way they move. Your eyes, they sparkle as if like when you're playing you're in your own universe (and I'd like to be in that universe with you). You say gosh instead of God (and how in the world could've I noticed that). I wish I could see you everyday. I would never get sick of seeing you and noticing small details about you.
There's nothing wrong with you I know it but deep down I know you're the boy those mothers tell their seven year old daughters to get away from but somehow somewhere in my heart I know you're that lover who every mothers wish their daughters had and every grandmothers invites to dinner. You're that lover dads invites to thanksgiving dinners to question your love for their daughter. Are you willing to take over their posts as heroes in their daughters lives, are you ready to be the man of the house (you're gonna live in with the love of your life near the beach, or in the city).
But you're so sad. So, so sad and it's devastating to see you like that. I don't know you (and I want to get to know you) but I know you're drowning. I know you need love and i know you want to feel loved. You once asked me "You take care of everyone but who takes care of you?" It doesn't matter who takes care of me, look at yourself. You're a wreck darling. I mean who am I to say that you are but I'm here for you, that's all I'm saying. No one can help you but yourself, I'll be here right next to you, rooting for you, even when you don't realize it. Even when you choose someone else to be next to you.
and p.s darling, I could write about and talk about you every minute of my life and even then that wouldn't be enough.
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