It isn't love, it's just lust

I have this bad habit, a toxic behavior or I dont know just constant craving for the nearest or closest affection I can cling to. Any outlet I can just put my love towards to. It's a behavior I've not yet to decide a blessing or a curse. 

Some days I have to convince myself that it's just me. I'm just THAT lonely. It isn't love, it's just lust. But long enough I can learn to accept it. I slowly learn to turn lust into love. 

Some days it's a blessing to just get over someone because you weren't in love with them in the first day. It's a curse when you start to doubt yourself about commitments.